first post

This is the first post in this new blog, and I am writing with such mixed emotions.

I am not ready to start again
I am not ready to put everything behind me
I am not ready to take on so much responsibility
I am not ready to give up everything just for four letter word
Changing a handphone number is not as simple as that
Deleting a blog that has been with me for so long took a lot of courage
Putting away the past does not mean that I am forgetting it
Answering phone calls from a party whom I do not enjoy talking to is not my style
Somethings were not meant to be
So what if the feeling was right? So what if the feeling was mutual?
Certain things just cannot happen because of the way our lives were made out to be.
I have my dreams and I certainly do not hope they remain as that
I want them to come true soon
Please feel what I am feeling and please...
please help me achieve them
even if you don't know the reason behind so
even if that means I have to leave, I will do it against my will
I know how you feel, I know what you have been through, I know what you have sacrificed.

This is totally not what I intended to blog about in my first entry because I plan to start my life fresh again. By doing this, I guess I am learning how to let go as well.

I am just going to say that some where in the days to come, everything will be clear
and everything will be fine.
I really hope this day will come soon

I hope, and I hope. Each moment in my life now that everything will explain for itself.